Are you an introvert or an extrovert? This question upsets me. Many people believe we can take every human and draw a line saying these are the introverts, and these are the extroverts. The problem is that there is just as much diversity and differences in the introverts group as there is in the extrovert group. However, when we label anything in life we summon a large list of assumptions that go along with them.
Humans use words to describe the world around them. When we look at the tall, wooden brown things on our lawns we call them trees. The problem is that when we label anything, we then see the words we use for them, and not the whole diversity of the forest. What if you were to meet someone new, and all you knew was that he/she was an introvert. Immediately our brains pull out this list that assumes that they don’t have many friends, they will not want to converse with others, they won’t like you etc. Already without meeting this person you have judged them and it limits the potential of anyone.
The terms introvert and extrovert may be used to describe where these people go to find energy within their lives. The introvert likes self-reflection, while the extrovert likes reflect through others. Both can have enriching lives and both have there pros and cons. One introvert could be the class clown who needs time in life to self-reflect. Similarly it could be someone who stays away from meeting others. An extrovert could be the shy guy who enjoys relating to others whenever he can, or he could be the annoying manic who needs to talk to everyone all the time.
So the next time you ask someone if they are an introvert or an extrovert, what do you really think you’ll learn from this? I know I never ask anyone this question because I don’t want to limit the whole specturm of personality down to to such simple words.
[...] [...]
Mr. McCaffrey two good points:
1) to distinguish that shy is different than introvert. I’ve been blogging and talking about this.
And 2) to ask that people drop the dangerous labels. In particular this resonates with me because there are so many negative introvert myths.
Patricia Weber
Business Coach for Introverts and Shy
Like the point you made about how the words “introvert” and “extrovert” don’t really mean anything. They are simply broad psychological terms that regular people don’t bother understanding. All they know is introvert = shy, extrovert = fun.
For now I consider myself an introvert. Currently I’m doing a sort of experiment to see if I can become more extroverted, move on the spectrum if you will. If you are interested, check the blog out.
Best regards,
in2ext